The Pleasure of Solitude


Lonely is almost entirely absent from my life

Brilliant phrase, yours, “I am only lonely when I’m with other people.” Sounds like a shoo-in title for your autobiography.

You and I may be rare birds.  I learned the pleasures of solitude early, though I made no identifying of it as a child and of course children are urged to become social creatures.  I married young and two years later the separation was good in every way but I was frightened. Then it struck me one day what a good time I was having and why on earth had I been so set on going out of my way to have someone to answer to? Particularly someone I didn’t like. 

Then just short of 40 I was in a potent relationship that – whew! nearly led to marriage – to a man who, younger than I and wanting children, thought nothing more important save breathing (and maybe not that) than THE RELATIONSHIP. Which made me an abstraction I didn’t like, though we were very much in something. And I got caught up in the ‘household’ thing, the ‘couple’ thing and ‘sharing’ thing, which caused me to throw up a lot and get bad headaches.

Life is very good especially when it comes without explaining every sigh and thought.  But I know how other people can feel bereft and lonely.

Lonely is almost entirely absent from my life, maybe hit once or twice briefly.

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